Ode to Dynamo Joe (opinion)

Ode to Dynamo Joe

Charles-Maurice de Talleyrand-Perigord, French Foreign Minister during the Presidency of John Adams, has long served as the icon of government corruption. No longer – not since the metamorphosis of Sleepy Joe Biden to “Dynamo Joe.”

Talleyrand attempted to shake down the three envoys sent to France by President Adams on a peace mission, demanding that a $250.000 douceur (sweetener) be paid him and a $10 million loan provided France just for an audience.

While the rewards for “serving the public” can be vast, after four decades of mediocrity, Biden’s footprint consisted of insignificant achievements intermixed with nickel and dime hustles; thus, the “Sleepy Joe” sobriquet. That was before Biden decided to boastfully disclose his “accomplishments” while Vice President.

Ukraine had complicated Obama’s commitments to Vladimir Putin and he smartly handed off responsibility for Ukraine policy to Vice President Biden. Sleepy Joe’s dim bulb suddenly glowed brightly; his son, Hunter, with zero experience in “energy production,” was quickly retained by Burisma, a corrupt energy production company with headquarters in Kyiv, Ukraine. Over $2 million a year was paid to Hunter Biden and his associate ($5500 per day) for their “expertise.”

Under criminal investigation by the Ukraine government, Burisma’s founder fled to the United Kingdom. When Ukraine’s top prosecutor scheduled a meeting with Hunter Biden, the situation didn’t bode well for either Burisma or Hunter. Burisma’s founder had at the outset, however, recognize the power inherent in Joe Biden’s office and the corruption inherent in his character. Biden was called upon to earn the $5500 per day.

The U.S. had granted aid to Ukraine in the amount of $355 million, plus a one-billion-dollar loan. Biden flew to Kyiv and, later, in an astounding display of braggadocio, describe what took place. “Sleepy Joe” transformed into “Dynamo Joe.” He announced he was leaving Kyiv in six hours and issued a mandate that will forever echo throughout the corridors of political corruption:

“If the prosecutor is not fired, you’re not getting the money.”

Proud of his criminal threat, Biden regaled his audience with the punchline:

“Well son of a bitch, He got fired and they put in place someone who was solid.”

With just 11 commonplace words delivered at the opportune moment, the Dynamo had:

• Brought an entire nation begging to its knees.
• Abruptly ended a major international corruption investigation.
• Assured the continued flow of money from the Ukraine government to Biden interest (so long as Poppa Joe remained in office, Hunter retained his “expertise”).
• Surpassed “Talleyrand” in the world-class rankings of the politically corrupt.

***        Reserved a space for America in the gallery of disgrace nations should it fail to prosecute Bidens corrupt action.

Viewing his spectacular accomplishments, amiable Joe might modestly state:

“Well, son of a bitch. And I did it all man, in one swell foop.”

Keith E. Putbrese

Natural Bridge